Is it okay to sell my body?

As a self-identifying introvert and the big, black woman I am, it is an arduous job to try and lure people of the opposite sex. It feels like such an occupation that I purposely remove myself from any situation that could get “flirtacious.” In this age of  “swipe if you like” it is hard to make a connection any farther than the physical. I’ve always held strong beliefs in beings a classy, reserved woman despite the stereotype that I sleep with anything. (Anytime I muster up the bit of confidence I have to go to a function and actually network, I’m surrounded by men and women alike that look at me crazy when I tell them I’m a virgin) So along with my complicated experience as a large dark, lady living in this racially pervasive time, specifically being that I can’t shake the preconceived notions of every white guy that has the unbelievable audacity to approach me and say “I like black girls,” as if that’s a compliment- I am my own proud cock-blocker. But there’s an exception to this rule that I recently discovered.

Strolling down a trashed sidewalk in the middle of a Long Island fair with some friends, a trend began to occur. Almost every man operating a fair ride would shout us down and let us get on for free. As friendly as I thought that was, it came with a price. With a twinkle in my eye, my hips swayed a but more and my breath heavier because I knew I could get what I wanted from someone just for selling my body. Thrilling in it’s lusty glory, I felt surprisingly empowered that a roll of my hip could get me an experience, I couldn’t buy. Almost as telling as Jazmine Sullivan’s “Mascara” I can’t fathom every other way this new medium could be utilized. I’m scared of myself now…


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